Reflection from Nina Laird-Fusilli
Boundaries, wow! Where do I begin?
So, my Sister and I were having this conversation about how we grew up not knowing about building healthy boundaries.
Incorporating confidence and character in a child, lessons in boundaries will naturally occur. In an ideal setting, the child grows up and possesses the tools to express “I’m not okay, or I am okay” with whatever.
But most of us from the “old school” were not given the tools, simply because our parents lacked the knowledge themselves.
Many of us did not acquire the art of assertion with tact.
I remember years ago asking someone, “Why do People always get picked on?”
Their answer, “Some people mistake kindness for weakness.”
What an astute statement!
Ergo, we live in a world where people’s meekness is perceived as an Achilles heel, to strike when vulnerable.
I must say I have failed miserably at boundaries 101.
I have a tough time balancing assertion with prudence. Many times My desire is to strike back and return the pain. But typically, I sit dumbfounded at the lack of propriety I receive.
Oh humans, where is God in all this?
Let me say, He is right there in your spirit , whispering, “Be kind, be gracious, be patient.”
But the wounds which wounded us, invite, taunt us to reciprocate to whomever is vulnerable.
It’s a dance really. A poor one at best.
Let this be our anthem: God help me to be the best ‘me’ I can be. Help me to be meek and kind. Slow to speak and judge, quick to listen with my heart, and help me to not return insult for insolence.
If I look like a fool, then I will be Your fool, Lord.
In Jesus name. Amen