Happy till I was 12 my parents divorced and that’s when it all went down hill. At 15 years old was locked up for something I didn’t do (they found drugs in my apartment that wernt mine)at 16 I lost my emotions through smoking weed, lucky me! After 2 years of suffering from demons and depression I became born again still depressed tho. At 19 i got filled with the holy spirit felt alive for the first time in so long was so happy filled with peace and love I thought wow this is too good to be true! I thought I would never he happy! But I am I love God so much thank u Jesus for ur love( disclaimed I was right it was too good to be true). Then at 20 in March I stopped feeling the holy spirit and I was feeling numb again, I didn’t know what was happening I fasted prayed read my Bible but could not figure out what was happening, then I was like it must be demons so i sechedueled a deliverance with my pastor one day I after work I felt the holy spirit filling me again and was told to spend my night with God by my pastor after not feeling the holy spirit for a month, I thought hey everything’s back to normal! So I went home watched a sermons read the bible and played a videogame. Boom, after I played the videogame my heart hardened. I lost all emotions ans the holy spirit left. Now it’s 6 months later can’t sleep no emotions in agony possessed by kundalinis demons who take my sleep.and beg God for mercy. There is none for me. Oh what was the purpose of this life suffering and suffering that never stops, and in the next life an eternal fire awaits me. Losing eternal life over a videgame I can’t make this stuff up. What a cruel God. More numb than I was before. Tormented by demons in my spine called kundalini spirits that have taken over and stolen my sleep day and night I beg God for mercy in terrible agony. How I rue the day i was born. I ask God why have u made me like this. But then I remember Paul in romans. How can the clay say to the potter why have u made me like this? Oh where is the mercy of God and the grace am such a wicked sinner. Have I crucified the son of God again by a videogame? Oh what terrible agony this life is. Why can’t I be normal? No God must destroy me because of a videogame and let’s these demons torment my soul day and night. What a cruel existence this is. And this is all I will get for thus life. The next life is fire. Thanks God for "your mercy endures forever ". 20 years old nothing nothing show for it. Just a waste of life can’t cease to exist must suffer. Lost eternal life over a videgame.
When you excepted Jesus as your Lord and saviour the evil one hates it. So you have to keep praying every day and night for the protection of the blood of Jesus he shed on the cross for our Sins. and believe it no matter what comes your way Believe you are protected. Find Psalm 91. if you haven’t got a bible and can’t afford one read it on Google. A bible is the word of God.
That is a lie out of the pit you just need to repent of any influence that will hinder the presence of God. He will always forgive if we confess and turn from sin. We don’t always feel His presence but He is always there with us. God is faithful even when we fail. Try to find a true strong believing Church to pray with you for diliverence. Pray for you Brother don’t forget there are tests and trials on our journey. God bless and keep you
Are you reading the Word of God and listening to solid doctrine day and night? You have to wash your mind and heart with the Word from God. You will get cleaned up if you endure. Your Faith WILL grow. It’s a race. Believe and get trained by Holy SpiritEvery word and thought you speak should be fairhfilled and full of hope. Call in to existence what you want from God and watch it come to pass! Our God is a redeeming God in His Time!!! Work it out!!!It took you 20 years to get polluted and believed the lies from hell. Now you need to transform your mind to Christ thoughts. In 20 years you will look back and you will be a blessing and so strong you won’t recognize yourself! Stay with The Lord May God bless you and keep you!
If you are been tormented by evil spirits/ demons , I recommend Daily Mercy because it has set me free. Its an extensive online deliverance platform that you can do from anywhere you have internet . www.ricardowatson.com and look for Daily Mercy , schedule a call