What to do if I do not like someone?

I know that as a christian, to hate someone is sin and we need to deal with it before God.

However, how about if i dislike someone? I do not want to pretend that i like her/him, what to do now?

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Good evening Kevin,

You are right we should not hate. Jesus actually tells us that He looks at hate in our heart as murder.

I understand what you are saying in your question. We should love everyone but it is hard to like everyone. You asked what you should do, I’m not telling you to pretend that you like them but I have found if I see individuals that “rub” me the wrong way I will still be nice to them. Don’t to put on a front but to be who Jesus wants me to be.

This scripture has also helped me when I am dealing with situations like this.

““You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5:43-48‬ ‭NKJV

Hope this helps.




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I also have this kind of person in my life, even he is my brother is Jesus Christ. I don’t like his life habits. In the beginning, I just avoided him, but recently, God reminded me to repent for my behavior without love. I begin to pray him, I believe he also want to change, he just needs more understanding and help.

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Hope it helps ^^


Yes, I also had such an experience. It was really not a good feeling. I also didn’t want to hate others. But I just can’t help. His action and words really anger me. I confess I can’t accept some action and words and bad attitude…So how did I get over it? Pray for it. Confess all your feeling and heart to God and pray for the ones who anger you. The Holy Spirit will come and do some reconciliation work. It is really miracle. My heart changed little by little. And others also changed little by little…
Actually I still not fully get over it. But I changed a lot comparing to the beginning.

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Wow. Thank you for that! I needed it! Praying for those who anger me is a better place to start than after I get to the point of hate. It’s anger in our hearts that Jesus calls murder in our hearts. That’s why it’s fruit is hate. So if I pray right away for those who anger me, I have a chance to circumvent the enemy’s plans: which is basically to separate us from God. There is never a time I feel more separate from God than when I get too angry or hate.

Pray for this guys, I know it is very hard to do it, but if you keep pray in God, it will be changed.

Pray for that guy, it is a spiritual warfare. It is not a physical warfare. God will pour down truth, love and gentle strength to us when we are going to get over the attack of the evil’s schemes, and be patient, God will work and turn the guys’ eyes and mind.

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Love him/her, pray for that guy. It is the only way by what we can help that guy toward God. The most effecient way to lead that guy to God.

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Be gentle and humble. Serve him/her first. When we find the need of that guy, we will have a merciful heart to pray for him/her. And he will see the Lord’s glory.

You can talk with your pastor and your friend to give you some suggestion.

I think first you can tell God this kind of feeling you have. You can pray for them, God will open up our heart to the beautiful things in others. Don’t lose heart. It it the super natural work of God.



That often happens. We may not like some of their behaviors or personalities, but we do like their souls, right? Let’s try to pray for our hearts and ask God to help us see with His eyes.

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We need to unite more with Jesus with Word and pray. If we are filled with Jesus’ love, we won’t be struggled about this.

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I think first you need to think why you don’t like that person. Did the person offend you or hurt your feeling? I also had few people I don’t like and hate. Because I felt hurt from their words. I did like their characters. I knew I should love them, but we just kept had conflicts. To overcome it, I prayed a lot, ask God to help. Repent my sin and pray for them. At the same time I listened message, through the sermon, I checked myself and could knew what is right and what is wrong, then I gained power to do the right things. God surely helped me! Now we are good friends and have good relationship!

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I feel the same way too…but the only thing I did is pray for that person and move on. Let time heal until such time you’ll eventually make peace with your past hurt. Ask forgiveness to God for hating that person tooo, and forgive yourself for hating him/her

Hi Kevin. I love how honest you are. And I think this is a great place to start.
We are called to love everybody, to at least demonstrate the love of Christ.
Here are the things you can do (IMO)

  1. Be honest about your feelings. (Which is what you’re doing)
  2. List down things why you hate the person.
  3. Talk to Jesus how He feels about that person.
  4. Start with small steps in expressing love.

There are many reasons why you could hate a person. It may be something personal or an offense that was not dealt with properly.

In my case, I put myself in this view: there is nothing about me that God would be interested about, that God would love. Yet, He still cares about me. That I can be sure no matter how I mess up, God will be there at my side when I come to Him.

This is hard, but when I shift gears and let me realize that God loves the person I hate the way He loves me, I am just, mind blown and pray He gives me grace to love that person well.

Don’t be rude if you talk to that person. Love your enemy as what they’ve told. In that way they will lose and you will win. Just be good and be yourself when talking to them, they’re really toxic but you must handle them with care. :sweat_smile:

Yes, we are not supposed to hate someone, even our enemies.

Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

However, loving your enemy doesn’t mean that you have to be friends with that person. Although it would be great if you can do it sincerely.

If not, then you don’t have to pretend that you like him/her just be formal.
And if that person is in need, help him/her.

Romans 12:20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.
Romans 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.